Aliya: Dreaming the Dream vs. Living the Reality

After dreaming it, planning it, and making it happen, why does it feel harder than expected?

Anorexia - the Ultimate “Protector” - and Discovering What it’s Protecting From

I was recently asked: “What are the most common deepest, darkest, most painful things that are lurking inside someone with anorexia and what are the most common protective mechanisms, or defenses that they generally turn to, to maintain their eating disorder?”

In this essay I try to answer this by offering a general overview of some of the patterns I have encountered repeatedly in my work, because of course there is no single internal system that sits underneath all anorexia. 

Fundamentals of Trauma Recovery, Part 4

Forgive yourself for not having foreseen, protected, or responded more effectively during the trauma.

Am I Depressed or Just Sad?

Growing up, I remember people saying, “I’m so depressed.” What made them so depressed? Various…

40 Years of Research: Why Solving Your Marital Disputes is Not the Solution

Many couples think that they just need to be able to find an agreement, a compromise, a solution to their disagreements. And that couples' therapy is about solving their disagreements. In fact, for many years this is how couples' therapists approached therapy as well. Unfortunately, this approach failed and statistically, their success rates were very low. But the field of couples therapy research has changed dramatically. In the last 40 years, Dr. John Gottman, Dr. Leslie Greenberg, and Dr. Sue Johnson, to name a few major names have made real breakthroughs, having studied many thousands of couples, watching them closely in action, on live cameras, video, behind one-way glasses and otherwise. One of Gottman's findings is that about 70% of our disagreements as couples, never get solved! And this is true not only for failing couples but for the very successful couples as well! So, if solving problems is not what leads to success, what does? The answer is that as a therapist, I can help them reach such an emotional bond that makes the issue of solving problems redundant, a non-issue. Once they have this bond, they will not necessarily need me to solve their problems. Find out more inside.

Challenges and Advise for People in Self-Quarantine

Self-quarantine is a situation that can be very stressful and challenging on many levels to oneself and one's relationships. This post examines the areas which may be challenging in an attempt to legitimize those difficulties. I offer the opportunity to reach out and seek ONLINE help in order to get through this trying period in a positive way.

Re-Frame Rejection so You Can Successfully Move Forward in Relationships

I have been rejected more times than I can count. By friends, boys, jobs, my kids, you name it… One of my most memorable rejections happened while in 6th grade. My English teacher encouraged us to write a journal, which I kept "hidden" in my desk. In it, I wrote all about a crush I had on a boy named Joey, a fellow classmate. I forgot that in the morning we sat at one desk and in the afternoon another. A fellow classmate found my journal and proceeded to read that very entry aloud to the entire class during recess.

Good Therapy is a Change in Scenery: Insights from the Other Side of the World

Every once in a while, important insights for my known world reveal themselves from the most unusual of places. My recent trip to the Far East: Myanmar and Thailand gifted me new insights and inspirations as a Jungian analyst. My mantra became, Good therapy is a change in scenery. In the safety of the therapist’s temenos (a beautiful Jungian term for the sanctity of the therapy space), patients meet the messages of the unconscious often for the first time. And in meeting these unknown voices and images, our inner and outer worlds transform themselves into newness and rebirth.

Isolation Has Brought Us Together

We’re in isolation, and isolation has brought us together. 

Challenges of Returning Reserve Soldiers

“Wow, so great you’re home, Aharon, now everything can go back to normal!” This sentence, and variations of it, have been said to me and countless other reserve soldiers over the last few months. Though well-meaning (and also an important injection of optimism and hope!), people’s wider networks are sometimes unaware of the challenges that returning reserve soldiers face.

Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You – Part One

My goal, after you finish reading this blog is that you will get a more comprehensive understanding of toxic worry and the tools to help you manage it better. Managing your worrying in a healthier way will allow you to free yourself, increase your energy level and give you a greater ability to love yourself and others. Worry only inhibits the expression of love.

Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You – Part THREE

Worry! Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You
Part Three
Strategies to Help you Manage your Worrying
I am glad you are back again to read the final part of my blog Worry! Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You. In part three of my blog I will give you some specific strategies to help you manage your worrying.
Here are some specific strategies and tools that can help you avoid toxic worry. Let’s get to it shall we!
Hallowell’s Strategies of Managing Worry

How to Track Anxiety and Help Resolve It

We need our ‘signal’ anxiety, because otherwise, we’d be more vulnerable to danger.

Fundamentals of Trauma Recovery, Part 3

While extremely distressing, flashbacks are actually memories. Registering what is a memory, and what is happening now, is essential.

Bagruyot Testing Accommodations for Olim

The primary focus here will be on accommodations for the Israeli Bagruyot. Providing accommodations at the Elementary school level is usually at the discretion of the school based upon psycho-educational testing. The Elementary school is not obligated in any way to provide the recommended accommodations and likewise can decide to allow them without a specific recommendation. There is no regulatory body regarding testing accommodations at the Elementary level.

Feeling Helpless? Here Are 3 Corona (or Anytime) Coping Skills

It can happen at any time or place. But especially now, with the impact of COVID-19 still being felt here in Israel even as things are finally opening up, it's an expected emotion to be feeling. Helplessness. And we are all in it together. Including your therapist. What can you do when you feel like this? Here are 3 powerful skills I know of.

Seen, Heard, Felt: Why AI Falls Short in the Therapy Room

Thinking of using an AI app for mental health? It might offer tips, but it can't replace a therapist. AI lacks intuition, can't read the room, and doesn't understand complex human nuance like a trained professional does. Learn why the human connection is still essential for navigating your mental well-being effectively.

Get Grounded With Art

Creative expression can be a soothing and releasing form of self care and help us find our anchor.

Communicating for Connection

A key task for couples is learning to express their needs explicitly, rather than expecting their spouse to read between the lines.

Fundamentals of Trauma Recovery, Part 7

Finding meaning, creating purpose, and gaining control is a recipe that results in greater resilience and fuller recovery.