Showing Up Just The Way You Are

As we approach the holiday season and celebrations are upon us we can feel very…

Simcha Guilt

A therapist reflects on his sleeplessness on the eve of his son's wedding.

Why Grownups Should Play Too

…as we get older, we stop playing. We feel the need to be productive or we feel so tired from our productive lives that we pursue mindless ways to relax and shut down, like watching TV, but watching TV is not playing, and playing is more important than you think.

Beyond Their Words: Understanding the Real Question

Peter Drucker wisely stated, "The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said." This article delves into that profound truth, illustrating how discerning unspoken messages can transform our interactions. We explore the critical skill of understanding the true questions behind the words, from veiled pleas for help to the silent cries hidden in seemingly innocuous inquiries. Discover why truly effective communication requires listening not just to what is spoken, but to the deeper needs and concerns that remain unsaid.

Can You Commit to Love Without All the Facts?

When we choose to marry, we often don't know everything. There are often things that are missing. After all, we haven’t seen how our partner behaves in a variety of circumstances, many of which they haven’t yet encountered. But more importantly we don’t always know ourselves. So we search for things to worry about in our partner in hopes of having some level of control. Not wanting to come to terms with the fact that we can't control the other. However, there is one element of control, and this lies within ourselves.

Re-Frame Rejection so You Can Successfully Move Forward in Relationships

I have been rejected more times than I can count. By friends, boys, jobs, my kids, you name it… One of my most memorable rejections happened while in 6th grade. My English teacher encouraged us to write a journal, which I kept "hidden" in my desk. In it, I wrote all about a crush I had on a boy named Joey, a fellow classmate. I forgot that in the morning we sat at one desk and in the afternoon another. A fellow classmate found my journal and proceeded to read that very entry aloud to the entire class during recess.

Fundamentals of Trauma Recovery (Part 1)

In trauma recovery, being mindful of your personal gauge will inform you what’s helpful, what is not, what soothes, what activates, what feels good, what is uncomfortable. Listening to your gauge is essential in deciding what’s the best for your recovery.

Embracing Your Fear

Eight years ago when I was diagnosed with Lyme disease I had a deep-seated fear of never walking again; that I would never be able to take long aimless walks like the days before.

Resilience Series Part 4

Adversities can tint our lenses dark, giving us a gloomy, hopeless outlook. We may struggle to see a way out and feel powerless. Fortunately, you can take off those dark lenses and adopt a brighter outlook. You can find meaning and purpose even in the face of adversities and visualize a brighter future. You can boost your optimism, have a more positive view of everything, and notice things and people you are grateful for. Moreover, you can find humor in daily life and find shared humanity with others, which may strengthen your joy and compassion. By improving your outlook, you can feel more powerful to ward off whatever life throws at you.

Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You – Part One

My goal, after you finish reading this blog is that you will get a more comprehensive understanding of toxic worry and the tools to help you manage it better. Managing your worrying in a healthier way will allow you to free yourself, increase your energy level and give you a greater ability to love yourself and others. Worry only inhibits the expression of love.

Can You FIX her?

The short answer? You cannot "fix" your wife. But you don't need to. You need something else a whole lot better...

The Fight or Flight Response: When Anxiety is Your Friend

Resilience Series Part 3

In the previous blog, we discussed strategies to manage our emotional reactivity. Although similar, regulating emotions isn’t quite the same as managing how we react emotionally. Whereas managing emotional reactivity works like a light switch that can dim the frequency and intensity of our emotional reactions, regulating emotions, on the other hand, involves altering our emotional responses to situations. We might consider regulating emotions as our ability to adjust our own emotional states. Sometimes we do this by increasing our positive emotions, whereas other situations are better handled by decreasing our negative emotions. How...

PERFECTIONISM is the Enemy of FREEDOM

It's getting close to Pesach and I'm thinking: what do I want to focus on at my seder table with my adolescent children who can now carry intelligent conversations and think about things in a deeper and more complex way? Afterall, our exodus from Egypt is not just a historical event and with kids, the way to facilitate spiritual connection is through relatable modern-day experiences. The obvious answer would be to focus on what each of us finds ourselves enslaved to in our lives and how we can access our personal freedom, but we've been down that road before and it hadn't hit home the way I'd want a good juicy introspective theme to do. So, I came up with IMPERFECTION

Get Grounded With Art

Creative expression can be a soothing and releasing form of self care and help us find our anchor.

The Emotion Valve

When someone is friendly, capable, and well-liked yet can't seem to make a relationship work, the answer may lie not in who they are today, but in who they had to become in childhood.

Dying at a Distance: Grief During Covid

Humans are incredibly resilient. I am constantly in awe of the people that I speak to, in my role as a bereavement therapist, who are creating amended rituals to help them cope with their painful losses. There is no correct answer to our predicament. It feels unfair to be deprived of the comfort of our traditions that help guide and heal mourners. However, we can try to creatively engage in meaningful adaptations of our rituals during this crisis to help us process our grief.

Seen, Heard, Felt: Why AI Falls Short in the Therapy Room

Thinking of using an AI app for mental health? It might offer tips, but it can't replace a therapist. AI lacks intuition, can't read the room, and doesn't understand complex human nuance like a trained professional does. Learn why the human connection is still essential for navigating your mental well-being effectively.

Canary in the Coal Mine

This article is essentially a tool of empowerment for people who may identify as highly sensitive or perceptive; who have grown up in dysfunctional or abusive systems, and who have found themselves treated as if they are the problem.

The Art of Communicating Honestly and Responsibly (Part 1 of Winter Series 5786)

Expressing feelings in marriage is essential, but it must be done honestly and responsibly to strengthen rather than damage your relationship.