Can You FIX her?

By: Daniel Fund

The short answer? You cannot "fix" your wife. But you don't need to. You need something else a whole lot better...

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Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You – Part TWO

By: Daniel Baum

In part two of my blog, “Worry! Ways to Manage Worry Instead of it Managing You”, I am going to present to you some general recommendations and thoughts about dealing with worry.

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Beginnings & Endings: Making Sense of Life Changes

By: Keren Burgman

The holiday season has ended, the parties and festivities subsided, and we come back to…

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ADHD or Trauma?

By: Aviva Zahavi-Asa

Over the last few decades, many children and adolescents have been receiving a diagnosis of ADHD at alarming rates. ADHD, which is typically understood as a brain or nervous system disorder which tends to be genetic in nature, is often identified when a child shows symptoms of inattention, distractibility, hyperactivity and/or impulsivity. What unfortunately often gets missed with a diagnosis of ADHD, however, is the possibility that traumatic events may be the source of these symptoms.

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On Becoming a Personal Scientist: Beginnings

By: Ruth Shidlo

As the baby gains enough safety and security via his attachment systems with the significant people in his life, he is able to identify and then befriend the familiar within the strange.

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My Unorthodox life: Exploring Differences of Opinion in Couplehood

By: Micki Lavin-Pell

When I work with couples through dealing with differences, whether it be religious or any other practice or want, I help the couple explore their deeper feelings around their differences of opinion and differences of practice. Couples deal with all kinds of differences. Some examples are issues around health and fitness, what kinds of food enters the home, what kinds of media are allowed, how to use finances, what dress represents members of the home, places to hang out and where not to go, how much time to spend together, what to do with the time they spend together, where to go on vacation, to name but a few.

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Of Guts and Brain: The Gut-Brain Axis

By: Ruth Shidlo

If you are willing to make a few changes, “disease goes away as a side effect of health.” (Hyman, 2012, p. 29)

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PERFECTIONISM is the Enemy of FREEDOM

By: Tanya Prochko

It's getting close to Pesach and I'm thinking: what do I want to focus on at my seder table with my adolescent children who can now carry intelligent conversations and think about things in a deeper and more complex way? Afterall, our exodus from Egypt is not just a historical event and with kids, the way to facilitate spiritual connection is through relatable modern-day experiences. The obvious answer would be to focus on what each of us finds ourselves enslaved to in our lives and how we can access our personal freedom, but we've been down that road before and it hadn't hit home the way I'd want a good juicy introspective theme to do. So, I came up with IMPERFECTION

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Fundamentals of Trauma Recovery, Part 6

By: Chava Lederer

In building muscle, you will literally build your container to bear it all. When your container is fortified, recovery will be easier.

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Dying at a Distance: Grief During Covid

By: Jeanne Lankin

Humans are incredibly resilient. I am constantly in awe of the people that I speak to, in my role as a bereavement therapist, who are creating amended rituals to help them cope with their painful losses. There is no correct answer to our predicament. It feels unfair to be deprived of the comfort of our traditions that help guide and heal mourners. However, we can try to creatively engage in meaningful adaptations of our rituals during this crisis to help us process our grief.

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The Hidden Layers: A Therapist's Guide to Understanding Trauma

By: Yisroel Picker

Just like an onion, trauma has many layers. What you see on the surface is rarely the full story, and true healing often begins when we start peeling back the "how," "who," "where," "when," and "why" behind the "what." This article explores the powerful onion metaphor in understanding trauma, revealing how a deeper look can lead to profound transformation. Discover why exploring every layer is essential for both clinicians and those on their healing journey.

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Valuable Tips to Manage Pain

By: Ruth Shidlo

Given what we know today, it appears likely that unresolved trauma, whether minor or major, plays a role in the persistence of chronic pain, through mechanisms of kindling (a self-perpetuating phenomenon of neural excitation) and priming (in which the brain readies itself to respond a certain way), that cause us to continually brace ourselves against the threat that caused the pain or the internal threat of pain itself. This is great news, because it means that to the extent that the trauma is worked through at the body/mind level, the pain should either disappear or lessen.

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4 Ways NOT to Apologize to Your Spouse

By: Yonatan Schechter

Couples occupy the same spaces, literally and figuratively, and it’s inevitable that they will clash or disappoint each other from time to time. When that happens, an apology is a major part of making amends. Here are some of the most common mistakes made when apologizing.

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40 Years of Research: Why Solving Your Marital Disputes is Not the Solution

By: Daniel Fund

Many couples think that they just need to be able to find an agreement, a compromise, a solution to their disagreements. And that couples' therapy is about solving their disagreements. In fact, for many years this is how couples' therapists approached therapy as well. Unfortunately, this approach failed and statistically, their success rates were very low. But the field of couples therapy research has changed dramatically. In the last 40 years, Dr. John Gottman, Dr. Leslie Greenberg, and Dr. Sue Johnson, to name a few major names have made real breakthroughs, having studied many thousands of couples, watching them closely in action, on live cameras, video, behind one-way glasses and otherwise. One of Gottman's findings is that about 70% of our disagreements as couples, never get solved! And this is true not only for failing couples but for the very successful couples as well! So, if solving problems is not what leads to success, what does? The answer is that as a therapist, I can help them reach such an emotional bond that makes the issue of solving problems redundant, a non-issue. Once they have this bond, they will not necessarily need me to solve their problems. Find out more inside.

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Bagruyot Testing Accommodations for Olim

By: Michael Roth

The primary focus here will be on accommodations for the Israeli Bagruyot. Providing accommodations at the Elementary school level is usually at the discretion of the school based upon psycho-educational testing. The Elementary school is not obligated in any way to provide the recommended accommodations and likewise can decide to allow them without a specific recommendation. There is no regulatory body regarding testing accommodations at the Elementary level.

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Survivorship Bias: Missing Planes and Missing Data

By: Yisroel Picker

Survivorship bias is like the WWII military only looking at bullet holes in planes that returned, while ignoring the ones that crashed. In the same way, we copy the 'hustle' of famous billionaires and think it’s a blueprint, forgetting the thousands of people who did the exact same thing and failed. If you only look at the survivors, you’re missing the full picture of the risks you’re actually taking. To truly survive, you have to stop obsessing over the winners and start looking at the planes that never made it home.

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Re-Frame Rejection so You Can Successfully Move Forward in Relationships

By: Micki Lavin-Pell

I have been rejected more times than I can count. By friends, boys, jobs, my kids, you name it… One of my most memorable rejections happened while in 6th grade. My English teacher encouraged us to write a journal, which I kept "hidden" in my desk. In it, I wrote all about a crush I had on a boy named Joey, a fellow classmate. I forgot that in the morning we sat at one desk and in the afternoon another. A fellow classmate found my journal and proceeded to read that very entry aloud to the entire class during recess.

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Shining Light on Feelings 

By: Yannah Popovitz

When we are able to just be with whatever we are feeling and experiencing, without judgement or an agenda we bring light

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Beyond Anorexia, Bulimia and Binge Eating Disorder: Understanding The Spectrum of Disordered Eating Behaviours

By: Hadassah (Johanna) Hazan

 

I feel frustrated when people dismiss lesser well-known disordered eating behaviours. My experience has led me to very confidently believe, that no one ends up in these sort of patterns, without there being something else going on, something that feels as if it requires some sort of distraction from, or total obliteration of. These things need healing. If they aren’t, they persist and the behaviours (coping mechanisms) developed to deal with them become harder to shift out of, thus limiting a person’s life ever more destructively. 

 

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Can Adolescents Act Abusively?

By: Aviva Zahavi-Asa

Parents are often reluctant to admit that their teenager is acting in ways which are abusive due to their own feelings of guilt, shame or a sense of failure. In some of these cases, the adolescent was exposed to domestic violence or experienced abuse within the family at an earlier age and then repeats familiar family patterns at a later stage. In other cases, however, no history of abuse exists within the family.

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